Here in the feisty but not combative offices of The Curmudgeon, we often find ourselves at odds with celebrity bloggers, even when it is us. Something about our schizophrenia, and of course that people and their beliefs, there likes and dislikes, are very intricate and complicated. The world is not written in black and white.
And so we find ourselves increasingly detesting Perez Hilton. We didn’t like him the first time we heard the name, “Perez Hilton.” I get it! How genius! It’s a play on “Paris Hilton!” Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! That this computer worm – this virus of a human – has somehow parlayed it into an Internet phenomenon is beyond my comprehension. This guy is so self-aggrandizing, so self-important that it is a pleasure to see him punched in the puss, by a Black Eyed Pea no less. Too bad it wasn’t Fergie herself.
No, he was punched by Pea tour manager, Polo Molina, out side the Cobra club in Toronto after the twit argued with band members Fergie and will i. am. He started an argument with the band inside the club. Hilton was there with something called a Lady Gaga when will i. am told him not to write about his band on his site. That’s all. It was Pest Hilton who went ballistic who, according to an interview with the AP, said:
He was like ‘You need to respect me.’ He was in my face. He was obviously trying to intimidate me and scare me,” Hilton said. “I was like ‘I don’t need to respect you. I don’t respect you and I did say this, and I knew that it would be the worst thing I could possibly say to him because he was acting the way he was. I said ‘You know what, I don’t respect you and you’re gay and stop being such a faggot.'” Now I ask you: who was the offensive one here?
At some point, in a scuffle outside the club undoubtedly caused by Hilton, he got punched in the face by Tour Manager Molina. Hilton then ran home crying like a little girl, puling. It was reported that “Hilton, whose real name is Mario Lavandeira, complained about the incident on the microblogging site Twitter. He tweeted at 4 a.m.: ‘I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke.'” (AP) Did you catch his real name up there? His name is Lavender. Ha, ha, ha, ha!
So he did file a police report (whining baby) and Molina turned himself in. The Pea must return Aug. 5th presumably to answer the charges, but I think their secretly planning on giving him a good citizen award.
I was thinking of changing my blogging name to Britain Spears. Whaddaya think?
The next day, Hilton goes off on GLAAD for demanding Hilton apologize the Fa***t word. Follow the story here.(Photo Credit: Black Eyed Peas by MzScarlett, flickr )